The Julie and Costea Show

Looking up the definitive definition of the word narcissist allows me to know that is not what I am. And I hardly think that I am alone in my thinking. It's like this: ever since I was a little girl, I felt at times like I was in a movie or a show, on stage, as though people were always watching me. (Ok, so notice my fear of narcissism, but truthfully there is no self-importance or lack of empathy or anything...)  I have no idea where this idea came from, but it's stayed with me, a sense that is at some times stronger than others. Like I am observing myself.

In a world of Instagram updates showing off every little thing we do, my fantastic ideas that people were watching me, have become reality for those who actually want that. I did so many cool things throughout my youth and can actually recall thinking, "Wow, how awesome is life, if only the people could see me now". I know I was not alone in this thinking because of the popularity of Facebook, Instagram and Twitter. These services arose in popularity because there were millions of people thinking that same thing. We're all the same in many ways...

I can't say I have totally taken to showing off everything in my life, nor would I want to. I will go over the reasons why much more in my "the differences between people here and there" and  "how I have changed" posts coming soon. But with all of that, I can't help from daydreaming about the crazy reality that will be mine and Costea's life when we are living and trying to make a go of it in the US of A. And in my mind that plays my life like a show, I mean, we are practically a reality TV sensation :)

So why will our life be so crazy?

Starring Constantin Grozav as Costea

For one, Costea has never been to the USA. He's met a lot of Americans, mostly Peace Corps volunteers, which one might argue are a breed of their own, but he's never experienced the kind of diversity he'll meet there: people of every color, religion, sexual identity and beyond. Of course I sense he is an accepting person but it will still be a big difference for him. Costea does know English so he'll get along in conversation. But the little sayings and idioms will surely get him at times. For example, one time when I was really mad (warning: not so yogic moment ahead...) I called him a 'piece of shit'. Rather than getting mad at my diarrhea of the mouth he started laughing because that just sounded so funny to him. He was imagining a little piece of poop and why I would call him that. I had to explain that it's a saying people use in America to describe a person who is not so nice. SO...one can imagine how many of those we'll go through.

and Julie Frieswyk as Julie

Next, though I am American, I haven't been in the USA at all in two and a half years. I have changed indeed and will have to find my place in my new role as an employee somewhere, a wife in America, and hopefully in some part of some awesome and supportive community of friends. But as the native between us, I will be the "root" so to speak. Costea won't have any roots and I need to be grounded enough for both of us. And for a girl who loves to fly, this will be a whole new challenge.

Lastly, I will share that Costea and I have quite of a bit of an age difference. I am the older one and surprisingly not too many people here have thought too much of it. We'll see if that's the same in America. I honestly always thought I would marry someone my senior, but you know, when you're the kind who moves with life rather than planning so hard, life surprises and amazes you constantly. 

I figure that as an outlet and for entertainment, I can document our transition to life in America a bit. I already have a few seasons of our show and maybe even a feature film played out in my head with about 1,000 different paths, variants and outcomes. It should all be interesting. Thinking about sharing our craziness makes me a little nervous and feeling quite vulnerable. I have definitely become a more private person in my time here. But the lessons we'll be sure to learn are probably too juicy not to share. And the laughs...

We want to be healthy and fit and introducing Costea to the "health nut" version of myself will be interesting. I can't wait to juice with him and do cleanses and experiment with food. We want to be more active than we've been here. There aren't exactly national parks and tennis courts around here. I want to hike and take yoga classes and to both take up tennis. Costea was the captain of his volleyball team so hopefully he can find some way to play wherever we end up. Oh and that...that's just another twist to this story...we don't know where we're going to live yet! A few irons in the fire but nothing for sure. So much is open and we're keeping our hearts and minds open. Finding our way around my friends who seemingly all have mortgages and babies, the new friends we make, our professional lives, and family, will keep us busy and above all, hopefully happy. This will be challenging...! This is life.

One More Week

One week from now I will be finishing 2.5 years of serving with the Peace Corps in the Republic of Moldova. This means a lot of emotions going on over here: in, around and through me. A lot of processing and reflecting. This is resulting in about a dozen different blog posts and stories I want to share. I know I haven't shared as much about my life as I used to do in these past months. I was going through so many changes at once I didn't have it in me to exist successfully in that while also regurgitating all of those experiences for reflection. And it's all coming up now. So I will be writing and sharing :)

I can tell you I am working on a number of pieces:

-The Food Post. I haven't written enough about how much the difference in food effects the life. And paradoxically how it doesn't change some things. I will probably post this one on Taste of Peace but will link here.

-The Julie and Costea Show:

-Before and After Reflections on how (I think) I have changed

They will be published in the order according to my whim in writing. This is all happening in between and whilst writing my reports for Peace Corps. Getting it all out and cleared for the next LEAP!

xo